Unsure?

To the girl who is unsure,

Are you scared? That this may not work out? And it will be another broken high-school romance story about shattering hearts and crying and whispering? I know what you're going through. I know you overthink and you think you are a debris, fragile and bleeding.

well, I'm scared too, of losing it all, of losing our 2am conversations to bold nothingness. But there is also a part of me which tells me to hold on to what I have, and enjoy this journey with our interlinked hands and conversations with a trail of laughing emojis. Of staying up all night in a faraway location, shivering in front of a bonfire.

And so what if it doesn't work? Maybe years after the drama we may bump into each other at the supermarket and catch up on everything over a cup of tea or if we like, bottled death-by- chocolate(DBC’s) and laugh over this particular part of summer.

The possibilities keep playing in my head and sometimes I wonder, what if it does work? Maybe you'll finally decide what to do and get a job and settle in. And we'll have a little house in your beautiful town with people having not-so-little hearts. Or we'd be travelling around the world in pursuit of something new.

And let me tell you, you aren't lost, you are a beautiful soul who's yet to be found.
I know, you hate when I say you deserve happiness but somewhere you know you deserve better, you don't deserve what you got.

I know, how vicious you are being to yourself these days, I saw the scars on your wrist. I noticed, how perfectly you fake a smile and click pictures. I know, there's a time, in the middle of the night where you feel that everything is crashing down on your head.

I know, you crave to visit all of your favourite places but you feel you don't have a companion to go. But you do have a companion, and that's you. There are times when I just pray that you understand what happened to you and stop blaming yourself.

Or maybe? these lines will compose your ranting hearts…

She wants to stay with you forever but,
she also needs some large amount of me-time.
She thinks she is perfect for you but,
She also thinks that she doesn’t deserve you.
She loves you hard but,
she runs away from love too fast.
She is your wall of strength but,
She is equally fragile and a furball.
She is bright and warm but,
But at night her heart is cold as ice.
She is all the light that you need right now but,
She is barely able to hold that darkness inside her.
She is a good person but,
She also carries a perverted mind.
She doesn’t want you controlling her at all but,
she wants you to hold her. Hold her for a while.
I’m telling you,
the girl you think you know,
She is black and white.
Fire and ice.
Yin and yang.
I’m telling you that the girl that you love, she is a paradox.

Either way it is a journey of the can-be's and the could-be's. But that wouldn't stop me. Wouldn't stop us. After all, all our lives are nothing but a giant anti-climax, unless we choose otherwise.

Yours truly

LOVE