Are you okay?

So this is how it’s going to be now:  Pull to refresh. Again and again. You've zero new notification, but you don't know what to do now. So, there's always Facebook - scroll away. Someone uploaded the photo of their food - like it. Your cousin updated his profile picture – again, like it. No, wait, heart it. Keep moving. Slowly. Steadily. Absorbing every irrelevant meme and information that's been thrown in your direction.

Now, switch the app - go to Instagram. Scroll more. Explore. Did you get another DM? Check once more. Like random photos. Follow for follow. Look around. Is there anything worth capturing? Or just take a selfie. Try the new filters. You can make a Boomerang too - fake laugh for it, because the real one is any way rare these days.

Now it’s time to open the most  ironical messaging app out there, WhatsApp. Open the chat window. Type something. Backspace it. Delete. Send hi to 7 people, and then wait for their response. I know you won’t send it. I get it. We don't know how else to deal with this gnawing loneliness. Talk with emoticons, because just words are no longer enough.

But there's something more - do you feel it too? The anxiety, the pull of sadness, the sensation that something is off - but you just can't pinpoint what. So, Google it. Search 'how do I know if I am doing okay?'. Some 6946760000 results in less than 0.05 seconds. Open the first link, validate yourself: you're fine. You don't need to change. The world will adjust. You just keep slaying.

 
It's 3 AM now. And you can't sleep. Open incognito tab. Search for porn. Pick out the amateur ones. I know it won’t satisfy you, so go for some incest porn. Masturbate while thinking about your ex. Wash your face and hope that this feeling of dread goes away, but it won't. But it doesn't. So, ask the Internet obscure things - am I depressed? Will I be fine? What's the meaning of life? Why doesn't 2+2 equal to 5?

Close all the tabs. Lie on the bed. Turn and twist. Listen to something, but you just can't fall asleep. Open your phone again. Pull to refresh. You've 1 new notification.

There. Do you feel any better?